I Should Have Known

Didn't want to post this but didn't want to keep this in my drafts anymore. 
6/11/17 I was thinking and wanted to type it all out. No hating.

I should have known you wouldn't wait for me.
I should have known from your past stories how you are impatient and give up easily.
I should have known you didn't actually mean it when you said I'm worth waiting for.
I should have known when you said you won't wait that long for me if I took a longer vacation.
I should have known when you asked if I wanted your full attention, you were getting tired of me.
I should have known when you said you can't promise me anything, it means you won't promise anything in the future either.
I should have known I wasn't that important when you completely forgot to remind me about something and you said I was your priority over and over again, priority my ass. Maybe I was your priority in the beginning.
I should have known you didn't like me that much from the beginning because you only like how I'm cute but don't know a thing about my inner beauty.
I should have known you were not a keeper when you hurt me with your "jokes". I can never get mad at you for long because I really wanted this to work. Like how you said you wanted us to be together. All those false hope.
I should have known something was up when you asked "do I have high hopes of us being together". I thought that question was strange. I didn't know how to answer because high hopes equals disappointments. Were you trying to hint something all along?
I should have known you were just too good at sweet talking and acting. How you were still counting down to our first date but ended everything the next day. I didn't realize because I thought your feelings for me were true... Maybe they were true in the beginning but as time goes by...they weren't real anymore...
I should have known all the red flags that were waving at me all along but I liked you too much to even care.
I should have known...we were just not meant to be.

I wish I knew ahead of time. But I didn't realize about these "should have known" until everything ended. Not until when I was reading our conversation over and over again when it ended.

If I knew all along I wouldn't like you in the first place. I thought you were a good one...

I'm stupid for still hoping you are happy and having a great life after all that.

Thank you for everything and the scar that you have engraved on my heart forever.

Random moment, I like this song, I heard this song playing in the van. I remember it was from awhile ago. The MV, I remembered watching the drama but don't really remember what it was about. Not sure why they put 2 names on there when it was sung by Alfred... His name isn't even on there...
我的離開也是愛 - Alfred Hui
"和你走近 要多少犧牲 假如天意 也想我安份 沒原因 未合襯
就算分開不要去憎恨
人生豈可沒淚印
逐段逐段舊情似是遺憾 就是日後共誰有著緣份
始終不可取替著這親切質感
若有天跟你再度走近 如同陌生也不驚震
日日夜夜為誰也是緣份
若有天因有這段感慨
才珍惜你的所愛 我的離開也是愛
離去走近 像律韻 感情相距 再不過問
才學會去放下繼續做人 無謂強忍
記憶猶新 每日每分 動人吸引
記憶留低這份愛"